My Own Doppelgänger

"Eventually, over time, we all become our own doppelgänger, these completely different people who just happen to look like us" - Ted Mosby

I've said this once, and I'm going to go ahead and say it again: I can relate everything in life to How I Met Your Mother, so here we go!

Four years ago, I started this blog to document my Day Zero Project. A coworker helped come up with my incredibly clever blog name based off of my last name. Thus "Dirty Londré" happened. After my divorce, I decided to keep my last name because, let's face it, it's way cooler than Mitchell. Plus all of my legal documents and accounts had that name, so it just makes things simple. I knew I'd have to ditch the last name sometime though, and I was ready for whenever that time would come (although it's coming much sooner than expected).

I finally have come to a place of wanting to remove it from my blog, which means I needed to come up with a new title. In an effort to try to come up with a simple, easy name, I asked friends on Facebook for there input. Points to those who came up with "ArrudAwakening." My friends are so silly.

One comment from my friend Cyrita left the idea of not defining myself by other people through my blog name. She said that my story is one of redemption and fresh starts. She gave Biblical ideas and really made me think of how I define myself, how others see me, and how I am seen by God.

This brought me to start questioning who I am. I'm not talking

some sort of existential crisis or anything, but more of a pondering on who I am today after coming from out of such a traumatic few years. I know more than anything that I don't want who I am to be defined by what I've been through. I will not be a victim. How do I want to define myself though? Suddenly, it hit me: The best definition for myself is exactly how God would see me. I am valuable, worthy, loved, forgiven...

One of my favorite verses is Matthew 10:31. I held on to it as I came out of the mess that was my marriage and it gave me comfort and healing. "So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows." God provides for the sparrows, and how much more are we worth to him than birds? Just as He promises to care for His creation, He cares for us as well. And in those times where I questioned who I was and what I was worth, I found my worth in God.

Four years ago Jennilea was a completely different person from who I am now. I was in a different place facing incredible challenges and learning how to cope in my abusive situation. Present day Jennilea a completely different person who is free and healed; I know who I am - and I know my worth.

So, with a new look and a new name, I introduce you to my blog: Ten31, a place where I share about who I am, the things I've been through, the way God has healed my heart, how He continues to move in my life, and every bit of adventure I get to have.

-jennilea

My Incredible Summer!

It's been quite a few months since I have been able to write anything.  My summer was incredibly busy - but so awesome!  Here is a update on my life.  :]

My Loves:
-Jadelynn turned 10 this year!  I seriously cannot believe how much she has grown since I first met her at 2 years old.  As most of you know, after my divorce, I am so blessed by her mom that she has allowed me to continue to love on Jadelynn and be such a huge part of her life.  This year she started gymnastics - and is doing a fabulous job!  She is doing great in school, and is just a sweet little lady whom we are all incredibly proud of. We had adventures this summer too:  One Direction!  Of course I had to take her to see them again.  :]
-Cobie is still just as awesome as ever.  He is 1.5 years old now and has started to calm down a little bit - which is actually pretty nice.  Haha.
-My boy.  We had all of the adventures!  He surprised me with fancy dinners, trips to the ocean, birds, the Seymour Marine Discovery Center, dolphins, whales - and overall has been the sweetest and most incredible man I have ever met.  I thank God every single day for the blessing I have received through our relationship.  Thank you for who you are, for praying with me, praying for me, leading us, providing way more than you need to, for making me laugh, for respecting me and being patient, and for the love and adventure of a lifetime.  9 months down into forever. <3
-The Dungeon:  Still working it out with team Dungeon!  It was hard to mix my gym life with my summer work life, but eventually I was able to figure it out and go in as often as I could - even using online sessions and hotel gyms when I was working out of town.  At this point - I have finally dipped below the weight I have been at for months! I know the numbers on the scale don't matter...but we all know it's nice to see them drop.

Family and Friends:

-My older sister moved back!  I don't have any photos with her - which I lame and I will have to fix when I see her later. :]  I have been able to spend a ton of time with her and her kids - getting to know her even better.  I love her so much! I went to Disneyland with my oldest sister, which was way fun too!

-I also went to Disneyland with my giiiiiiirrl - and watched my other "giiirrl" Zach graduate from the Sheriff Academy!

-My friend Nikki wrote her second book - which I was so blessed to be part of!

-Christina introduced me to ArtMix and got to by my hero at work.. :]
-The birth of Mini Mimi, dancing (killing it at the wobble), camping, wedding planning, pumpkin patches, and adventure happened with my new family and some of the best friends a girl could ever ask for.

Adventures with K-LOVE and Air1:  

My job probably kept me the most busy this summer.  Going into promotions, I was prepared to have weird hours, minimal weekends off, and the time of my life - and that is exactly what I got!  My summer was full of prep for event, going to some of the most amazing worship nights and concerts, community events, wonderful volunteers, listener stories, and travel!  One of my favorite things was being able to travel to Colorado for our team Summit and to serve with my amazing coworkers from Denver, Arizona, and So Cal, Texas, and Kansas at HeavenFest (2 days) and Harvest SoCal (3 nights) - which are weekend festivals full of music and fun.  Here I had the opportunity to set up our HUGE K-LOVE and Air1 tents and experience for the first time what it's like working a festival with K-LOVE and Air1.  It was busy and so exhausting, but every now and again, we would hear these amazing stories from our listeners, which quickly lifted my spirits as I remembered why I am part of this ministry.  I've said it a thousand times: I love my job!

Next up - I'm going to Italy!  Jessica and I will be on a 2-week adventure in less than 1 month!

Life is beautiful.

In other news:  The first motion picture theater opened in Los Angeles on April 2, 1902.
Find out more cool California facts here!

-jennilea

This Is Where My Life Is: A Pictorial

My wonderful - amazing - incredible boyfriend, Brian.  To wake up each morning to a prayer by text is indescribable.  Praying together. Growing in God together.  These are the things in my relationship I value the most. There are times we can't stop talking to one another - and other times we sit in silence and just enjoy the company of one another.  My heart sure does enjoy him. <3

My sweet girl. My princess. I am so blessed beyond measure to be able to continue a relationship with this love. Each moment I get with her is incredible and I cherish far beyond measure. She is so smart and getting so big. I can hardly believe she was just nearly 2 when I met her. She will be 10 this year. Time sure does fly. 

The puppy - Oh man do I love my pup.  Cobie is absolutely incredible.  So smart - and definitely keeps me entertained.  

Then there is my giiiirrrrl.  My PIC.  She has been a constant encouragement in my life and always points me back to God when I need it - Plus we go on a ton of adventures so that's neat.  I love her so much. :]

My Juanita - whom I have grown incredibly close with so fast. She loves monopoly and will wait 2.5 hours with me to get a cup of free coffee from Dutch Brothers.  She loves Jesus, helps me stay sane when I feel like I'm freaking out over dumb things, and is just an overall amazing person.  Through Brian, I've gained another sister - whom I cherish so deeply.









My friends who have become my family. Brian's family is the kind of family I have always prayed for - huge and super close. Along with him, I've gained them.  Bri, Toni, and Sarah have become the girls I spend most of my time with.  They each have their amazing points:

Bri was the first person in Brian's family I really connected with.  She is hilarious - and also helps me feel better when I freak out over dumb things.  lol.  She's incredible, and I can't wait to spoil mini mimi in a few months. 
:]

Toni was the first person I met in Brian's family and it was an instant welcome.  She was kind, excited, and I absolutely love having her has a friend, family member, and cardio buddy.  She da best..

Sarah's bangs are bangin' and her eyebrows are always on point.  She is blunt - to the point - and I love it.  One of the strongest personalities I know, and just a ton of fun. Plus we both love Marilyn.  I love getting to know her - and just being around her.

Nikki has been through it all with me - enough to build an incredibly strong friendship.  I've seen her grow a ton in the last few months - and she's seen the same from me.  She is incredible, strong, and I am so proud of who she has become and all of the wonderful things she is doing.

Christina - I don't get to see her nearly enough, but she is that friend who stays solid throughout time.  I can pick up the phone at any moment, and things continue where they left off.  She keeps my head straight and makes sure I don't jump into things - while also encouraging that I jump into adventure!  It's because of her that I have such a great passion for going anywhere and doing as much as I can in life.  In short, she is awesome. 

My older seesters.  I love them.  Tara is one of the smartest people I know.  She is hilarious - and I want to be like her when I grow up.
Nicoleon sends me bear jokes and makes me laugh.  I admire her strength.  She tight.  
My two older sisters are probably my role models.  I look up to them in pretty much all areas of life.












Panda.  :]  This is one of those long distance friendships that manages to still connect like family.  I love her - and am so proud to see what she is making of her life.  She has truly risen from the lowest points to be successful and an amazing mother to her two little ones.








The rest of my life consists of games, lifting, church, and my wonderful job.  I love where life is right now.  I feel blessed to have such incredible, amazing people around me.  

I get to work full time in a ministry where God uses me each day to be the hands and feet of K-LOVE and Air1 - in a way I am so passionate about!

I am surrounded by amazing women (and men) who train incredibly hard at The Dungeon and see such extreme results!  I am inspired by Katie Felix who has made the most incredible changes in her body.  I am encouraged by Jamie, who pushes me to the vary breaking point during all of my workouts.

1 year ago - I didn't realize life could ever be this cool.

Forks, Washington

11:00pm, we finally drive into Forks, Washington.  The town was very small, as expected.  We arrive at a hotel, which we are hoping is cheap enough for us to stay in.  Katie ran in to check on pricing, and runs out, exclaiming "Guys!  We are staying here!"  Nic and I assumed that would mean that the hotel was cheap enough, but Katie continued to say, "The only rooms they have left, are TWILIGHT THEMED!"  

Yep, we were definitely staying there. 

At this point, Nic turns to me and says, "Are you kidding me?  Is this a Twilight trip?!"  I laughed pretty hard.

We go to check in, and the say to us, "Team Jacob or Team Edward."  Typically, I am not on any team, I know what happens in the books; I enjoy looking at Jacob more than I do Edward, so we picked the Jacob room. 

We walked into our room, only to find completely red walls, paired with black and red bedding.  We were greeted by a large photo of Jacob and a "New Moon" movie poster.  The towels all said "Twilight" and the pillows had pictures of the characters.  This room was just silly - but awesome.  We turned in, and were up for the next morning!

First on our list, was to check into the only place we actually planned to stay:  The Cullen House!

We arrived at the Cullen House, and it was gorgeous!  The guy who greeted us was really nice.  He quoted us $125 and said we could pick out whatever room we wanted.  We got a little tour of the place, including a wall of graduation caps, and Carlisle's office.  We ended up picking a room with a huge bed, living room with a pullout couch, kitchen, dining room table, it's own entrance, and a Jacuzzi spa bathtub!  This room was all my dreams!  The rooms had all of the Twilight Movies and books, as well as a few spoofs on the film.  We explored a little, and ended up receiving a letter from the Cullen's explaining that they were sorry they could not be there while we were visiting.  The innkeeper told us two versions of how the Bed and Breakfast began:  one twilight version, and then the actual story.

The Bed and Breakfast was actually running much earlier than when the book came out, but this house was the closest thing in the town, as described in the book. The innkeepers were lovely, and I would most definitely stay here again.  They were very helpful and gave us a lot of information about the town.  They also provided us with directions to La Push, which was our next stop.

We went to the Quileute reservation so we could visit La Push beach.  Right as you enter the reservation, there is a sign saying "Treaty Line:  No Vampires Allowed."  We continued on, and saw Jacob's house - which was very close to the one in the movie.

Finally, we arrived at the beach.  It was gorgeous. The water was freezing, and it was cloudy, but I loved being there.  There was a little island further out, that was supposed to be where the cliff diving happens in the movie.  Come to find out, the water is actually much to shallow to do so.

There was a long pile of logs and rocks which let to a makeshift light house.  We decided to tackle it, and make it to the end.

The beach was nice and peaceful, but it was time to move on to Port Angeles.

We drove to Port Angeles and had dinner at Bella Italia, as seen in Twilight.  We sat in the booth that Bella and Edward would have sat in, had the film actually been made there. Katie and I ordered the mushroom ravioli, just as Bella did, and it was delicious!

Finally, the day was to be ended with knocking another item off my list:  Sending a message in a bottle.

I purchased a Starbucks drink, cleaned out the glass bottle, and stuck my letter in it.  In my letter, I discussed knowing your worth, and encouraged whomever the letter might find (if it ever does).  I was not sure if I should write my name on the letter because I am pretty sure this is considered littering, but Katie reminding me that it was probably not going to make it to anyone, so I decided to write my name.  As soon as I threw the bottle, it began floating towards the shore...oops!

It was a fun moment.

When we woke the next morning, the innkeepers had made us a delicious breakfast of Eggs Benedict, along with fruit, pastries, juice, and tea.  It was amazing.

The last thing we did on this trip, that I was able to scratch off my list, was burning memories.  I wrote all of my bad memories on a piece of paper, and then burned the paper.  It was a pretty freeing moment; there were a lot of bad memories.

I have now completed 72 of 101 goals.  In my next blog, I will discuss my most recent accomplishment.  I am very excited, and hope you are too. :]

-jennilea