Birth Control Confessions

Fun fact: Birth control has the power to destroy your mind.

I don’t mean that every form will do it, or even that all people will experience the same thing, but it sure did make a difference for me.

I’ve been on the Mirena since last year and half the time I haven’t been able to tell if I was sad due to Postpartum Depression or if something else was going on. About 3 months ago I noticed the timing of experiencing extreme sadness. The same time each month, lasting about 2 weeks time. In those two weeks, I experienced a wide range of emotions from getting defensive to small things, feeling like people absolutely hated me for no reason, to being ultra critical and unreasonably upset about small things. I would cry out to God to just fix me. I hated who I was becoming.
This is not who I am.

What really sucked is that I couldn’t pull myself out, which I think I’ve said before. I tried to brush it off as the stress of that is going on in our world, but when I noticed the pattern of timing, I knew it had to be more.

I talked to my doctor about what I was experiencing, and we agreed that it would be best to try something new. It’s been almost a month and I feel so different! I feel peace and joy.

I feel like myself. 💚

I’m loving more. I’m seeing people for who they are rather than taking things personally. I love who I am. I love my people.

I’m grateful for my incredibly patient husband, Brian. I am thankful for being called out, de-escalation conversations, and venting sessions with my brother Chris and sister Meloney. I’m blessed by the support and advice from the first class friends who know exactly who they are.

Hormones are wild. If something feels off, it probably is. Never stop advocating on behalf of your needs.
When you get tired, know that there is an army of people willing to help you fight and work toward getting answers.

Maybe you’re in a similar place where you feel utter sadness. Maybe it’s something completely different from hormones. Whatever the case is, I encourage you to keep looking toward those bright lights until you find your answer. Days may be hard, but it always gets better. 💚