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Friday, May 16, 2014

We don't stop living.

I would like to start off by saying "Thank you!"  Thank you to everyone who has reached out to me in the last month and been encouraging and loving.  Thank you to everyone who has shared their stories with me - even though many of you don't actually know me.  It takes a lot to be that transparent and vulnerable in such a sensitive situation and you have all overwhelmed me with your love, support, and prayers. I am so grateful for each and every one of you.  You have all helped me grow a bit stronger.

So given all of the life changes, I fell into a brief slump where I just didn't want to do literally anything.  One day I woke up and decided that, even though we all face trials, we don't stop living.  It's not an option.  In fact, during the tough times we need to get out there and live more than we did before.  I needed to do things for myself, have adventures, go to class, complete goals on my list...live.

I've done a lot of list things since I made the decision to keep moving forward:

Completed "The Time Traveler's Wife"
Started "Mortal Instruments"
Pointed to a spot on the map and went there (Half Moon Bay)
Drove through the guard shack at Yessica's house without stopping (my rebel phase)
Walked across the Golden Gate Bridge (loved doing this!)
Completed a 1000 piece puzzle:

After attempting to complete a 1000 piece puzzle at least 2 other times, I am proud to have finally finished this one.  It was definitely a lot more challenging than the others, but doing this puzzle was some great alone time.  Actually, working on this puzzle was the first time I really felt okay being alone...so that was kind of a big deal.

Music and puzzles...my escape.  :]

I have now completed 87 of 101 items with 142 days left!  EEK!  I better get to work!

Next, I'd like to address dating.  I've been having sort of a tough time with this subject lately.  One thing I promised myself was no rebounds.  Just me, Jesus, family, and friends.  I don't want to rush into anything.  So, making this clear to the world:  My life just changed in a major way.  I am not dating right now.  Stop asking. Stop assuming.

Along the subject of dating, I've began watching "Boy Meets Girl" from Louie Giglio.  The message in even the first talk was absolutely amazing!  One hour in, and I've come to an even greater sense of my worth and value.  I've learned to grow, mature, and stay in my fortress of intrinsic value before seeking out any relationship.  It is so incredibly important to know your value in God because that value is so much greater than what you will find in any other relationship.

Louie says "Brokenness gives way to restoration.  Wear newness in the midst of our brokenness and healing can come."  Run tell dat, Louie!  Lol.  I am taking those moments of brokenness and letting God change me, heal me, make me whole, and make me new.  I have to say, I am loving all of the amazing things he is doing in my life.  I really do feel value, healing, and change.  I feel happy.

Finally - school is out.  One more semester and then I am done.  Forever.  :]

In other news:  Butterflies range in size from a tiny 1/8 inch to a huge almost 12 inches.

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